If you want honest feedback (and that’s an important decision itself that you need to make!), then you need to learn to keep your emotions in check.
There’s a time for “putting it all out there” and “being authentic,” but that’s not when someone brings you their problem or when dealing with an important issue. Our emotional response does more to set expectations and create barriers to communication than anything else we do.
Make a decision. Be yourself. Get mad and vent. Rant & rave. Work through it. We’re emotional people, right? Just don’t expect people to give you a second chance, be understanding, see that you’re really a softie inside, or be straight up with you or give you honest feedback. If you act like a hot stove, people will only touch you once.
Or… put your game face on. Project balance. Resist the urge. Be controlled and wait to react when you’re behind closed doors. Grow thick skin. Cultivate a reputation for patience, fairness and wisdom. Reward other for being honest with you, even when it’s not what you want to hear and you will earn a following and a loyalty.
Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. Proverbs 17:27-28