Recently my daughter went shopping with her aunt and came back with a ton of clothes. One thing you should know about my daughter is that she’s not into fashion. In fact, sometimes we really wish she’d show a little interest in how she dresses, but we figure that will come with age and time. But tonight, it seems like that all changed when the clothes kept coming out of the bags and the receipts kept stacking up.
I love my daughter and am excited that she wants to look cute, but I’m also on a budget. It just so happened that the same day as the shopping spree, I had a plumbing leak that resulted in an entire wall being cut away, insulation removed and having to dry and dehumidify 2 rooms. Sound expensive? You bet!
Also (they say things happen in 3s) one of the cars needs an emergency brake job – think pads AND rotors – and the air conditioning suddenly decided it didn’t want to work anymore. I’m glad it’s just March & still cool. Did I hear someone say “stressful?”
So when my wife and daughter had to run to the store to pick up a few items for a party at the house tomorrow, you can imagine my wife’s countenance and mood. Liz sat there quietly and when Laree asked her if anything was wrong, she said she was a little overwhelmed about the clothes. “Can I keep them?” was the question on her mind. “I know it’s a lot of money,” she said. Never let it be said that children aren’t perceptive.
My wife’s initial response was something along the lines of I don’t know and we need to look at how much we spent and maybe we can keep some of them. Not the most comforting of words to a 13 year old who suddenly has an interest in how she looks. I can imagine the look on her face (both of them!).
Here’s where the story takes an interesting twist.
My daughter really wanted some jellybeans to give out at the party, but the big bag in the grocery store was $10. That’s right, for jellybeans! Kind of ridiculous in my opinion, even if it hadn’t been a thousand dollar day already. My wife was of the same opinion. Liz, being a gracious young lady, understood, but was clearly disappointed. However this time my wife suggested they stop and pray about it. “Lord, you know our desires and also what we’re dealing with at home. We want our party to be a blessing and we commit it to you.”
They then picked up the rest of the items they were looking for and went to check out. Everything except one forgotten item, that is, at the back of the store. And it just so happened that on the way, they passed the Easter candy isle. And lo and behold, there’s a bag of Easter jellybeans, a big one, for $2.49. Liz beamed.
On the way home, my wife asked, “would it have made you feel better if instead of a gloomy response about the clothes, I said let’s just pray about the clothes and trust God that we’ll make a wise decision? That maybe we’ll keep some of them or maybe even all of them, but let’s commit the decision to Him? Would that have made you feel better?”
Of course it would have. There’s a couple lessons here. First, the way we respond matters. We have countless opportunities to fill our children’s (and others’) minds and hearts with hope and encouragement, with comfort and trust, in the way we choose to handle their questions and concerns. We can, with a word, a tone of voice, an expression, build up or tear down.
Second, every trial is an opportunity to pray. Didn’t Paul command us to pray without ceasing? God has time for jellybeans and clothes for a 13 year old, and all the little stuff that’s big to the little ones. God has time for your concerns too. Cancer, losing a job, death of a loved one, all the big stuff. It’s not about the size of the problem, it’s about the priority of the prayer.
Love well with words and deeds and pray fervently.